Monday, July 21, 2014

Gabapentin



Gabapentin was the last drug I took to battle my trigeminal neuralgia pain. The other two were complete duds that did little to stop the agonizing pain. As the proverbial cliché states, “Third time’s the charm!”

Once again I started ballooning like the BF Goodrich blimp. I gained ten pounds in a week, like before I did not change my diet, the weight gain just happened. The dreaded gain was the least of my worries, I had dreams that I would like to forget.

I think it was the fourth day, the first day of taking the full dosage of Gabapentin that the world of Donald Bellisario, Rod Serling, and Ray Bradbury invaded my sleeping mind. I dreamt a series of interconnecting dreams, one would end and it would continue in the next dream until I awoke. I can only think of one other time when this has happened.

The dreamt I was my dashing heroic fighter pilot, instead of blasting the evil from the friendly skies, he was investigating a murder that coincided with a missing shipment of missiles. The whole set of connecting dreams was dull until the end. Ryan was walking down a desolate beach trying to clear his mind. He heard something to his left and looked over a row of saw palmetto. He could see the missing missiles sitting in the back of a van, then a body bag being disposed of.

Wolf pulled out his 9MM and checked it, one round in the magazine. He grimaced and pulled out magazine, one round. He pulled out another…again only one round. It seemed like time was in a bottle during this particular scene as he searched for the missing rounds. The dream went blank but I do remember him firing a round.

I was behind a two way mirror, watching my wingman, Lieutenant Kara Pike and NCIS Agent Gibbs grilling a man. He caved and confessed, “I killed Lieutenant Commander Ryan Wolf.” I was too shocked at the startling revelation to do anything. I stood there stoically, watching as he sang.

Seconds later I had enough and walked away as I muttered something about it being time for a Cold Case type ending. Pike did a double take, she saw me walking out. My former wingman quickly excused herself and vainly rushed outside, for I was long gone unlike the ending of the TV show.

As of writing this, I will not discuss this dream any further detail. I won’t investigate or attempt to delve deeper into it. Nor will I attempt to search for any meaning other than it was a figment of a stupid pill I was taking. The next night I again found myself as my hotshot character. He was sent back in time to stop a murder from taking place…Do you see a pattern forming?

This dream was different than the previous one. It was interconnecting but cloudy. I didn’t see things completely, almost like looking through murky water. The ‘veil’ lifted towards then end. Ryan was struggling with the- would-be murderer. Wolf was stabbed in the left arm, but managed to save the day when the culprit turned himself in.

Ryan’s arm was in a sling as he stood outside the police station. His fiery wife Brooke took his hand and a mysterious truck pulled up a second later. “Come on,” he calmly stated and led her away. Another truck pulled up, they quickly picked up the pace of their walking. The couple ducked down alleyway, finding another truck pulling into it. They retreated back, finding a curving walkway between two stone buildings. I was looking down with the sense of that we would find something waiting for us at the next intersection, then my alarm clock blared.

“No more,” I muttered as I got up to do my early morning routines. I called my pharmacist and he told me to wean myself off like I started the pills. I did just that, but did it ever knock me on my furry fanny! Aches and pains in the back were about as bad my TN pain. However, the TN pain was the worst I ever felt. I took four Aleves to kill the excruciating ache in my left cheek. The hellish thoughts of ‘Why won’t God take me,’ made the pain all the worse. Thankfully He allowed the naproxen to work and things settled down.

I took three prescriptions, none of them successfully neutralized my atypical trigeminal pain, but they conspired to wreak havoc on my body. No more, I will battle the unspeakable pain through diet, supplements, and other means when it becomes legally available.

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